In her advice column of Friday December 28th 2007 entitled "Oh, the Things You Find Out Online", Margo Howard (daughter of the late Ann Landers) advised a married man who found himself blurting out "I love you" to a male friend that, "You are gay" and some how unaccountably left out the "B" word.

While in general Margo was gay-positive, to-the-point and correct in telling him that he was most likely NOT straight and to seek counselling, this over-site on her part could have a significant and negative impact on this man and his family's life.

Please help.

Contact Margo (direct e-mails do not seem to be allowed, you must click on the link provided and respond via a form in the column) and discuss the existence and possibility of 'DAZED AND CONFUSED' being a repressed, heavily closeted, married BISEXUAL man. Hopefully she will prove to be as intelligent and open-minded as she seems and will quickly correct this omission on her part.

Here is the link and the column:

http://news.yahoo.com/b/dear_margo/margo_howard20071228

DEAR MARGO:

I find myself in a predicament that I never in a million years would have predicted. I am a 25-year-old man who is married to a beautiful, committed wife. Recently, I was chatting online and met a guy. He was funny and quick-witted. After a while we exchanged numbers and have talked for more than two hours every night since. Margo, I hate talking on the phone! Last night we were talking and laughing together, and after a moment of silence, I said, "God, I love you." I immediately apologized, but he said, "Don't." He said he has been fighting saying it, too.

Margo, we are both straight, and we both believe homosexuality is a sin. Neither of us knows what is going on. I haven't had any desire to spend time with my wife since this person came into my life. I only want to talk with "Matt." What is going on?
--- DAZED AND CONFUSED

DEAR DAZE:

Let us recap: You "met" a guy online. You've been talking with him on the phone for two hours a night -- and you hate phone conversations. You told him you loved him; he said he's been having the same thought. The two of you believe homosexuality to be a sin. Since you and cyber-friend "met," you have had zero interest in your wife.

These things would not, could not happen to a straight man. You are gay, my friend, though heavily repressed because . . . it would be sinful. I believe you and this other chap are so closeted that you've been hiding from yourselves. Because of your religious convictions, I am pretty sure there's an element of self-loathing, if only at the subconscious level.

I would suggest you seek professional help and guidance. Get the national number for GLBT counselling referrals. And perhaps take a break from "Matt" until your identity question is settled, one way or the other.
--- MARGO, STARTLINGLY

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